the future is a big question mark

dun you ppl think so? you see, i am at a forked road where i must choose between two roads.... one will go in one big circle and lead to this fork again... i am talking about jc education or poly education or other educational institutes... hmmpht... i should go do research liao... self research and job market research... haiz... tell me... so many things to do right? i haven even get over my os... i tink i am stressed... when i am stressed, i rant... i am ranting... yeah yeah

hah! my sis is a bugger... she is a pain in my @$$... oklah.. she not that bad.... but hey... she still is one heck of a bugger...

do html codes work on this page? i hope so... bah! i suppose they do... my friend has just sworn off the net... hah! typical... then she'll crawl back and be a slave to this monitor... if you notice, my paragraphs are kinda disjointed... like they talk about different things successively... like my thoughts are all over the place... its becoz my thoughts are way much faster than my typing... so... thats wad u get... before i finish typing about one thought... zoom... off i go talking about another... hah!

feeling thirsty... hadnt been getting my fluids today... actually... i had too much fluids... then it all came out... heh! i had home made lemon tea... and a whole lot of lemon... no wonder i am thirsty... or think that i am thirsty.

anyway... i realise that i hate being lonely...

and i hate ppl who break off appointments and break them off at the last minute and do not bother to call your handphone when your home phone is occupied and heavens know what is wrong with your handphone or their handphone such that you do not receive the msg that u were supposed to... that was a long sentence... oh well... yeah... i know a lot of ppl dunnot know the existence of my blog yet.. so well, i take comfort in the knowledge that that person will probably be oblivious to the fact that it pisses me off... fine... its a lesson to me... i shall call very very early if i want to break off an app... bah!

hmmm... letsee... i have tons to do... but hey! it the thrill of the chase that appeals to me... i'll probably write one sentence of my ss essay then walk around the house for a good 5 minutes before thinking about the essay again... and then digress to other stuff on my table.. hey there's that book i have never ever read since primary 3... i got it off my primary school library... GMPS... i havent returned it since... imagine the amount of money i have to pay in fines if i brought it back... it'll probably be stamped 'comdemned' and then thrown into some dark corner behind a staircase where all the condemned books went... i remember an encounter when oh crap... i made my sis angry... she doesnt know what is insisted... bah! ok... fine... i am snappy today... i just snapped at her... asking what isit that she wants to write... oh oh... i am in deep shiat... i don't mean to make her feel bad... haiz... bloody temper... i guess what got to me was the blank stare i got from her when i suggested 'resist' instead of 'insist'... yep... she cried... bugger... i hate myself... i wish i had more control over my patience... and i have the give of gab... i guess i am not cut out to be a teacher... my tutee's grades are suffering... okay... so they are lazy... but i am the one that have to engage them in the lesson and like help them like the subject... i need to pick up a course on psychology... haiz... yes yes... am remorseful... maybe it really works that way...

am thinking about the justice done to muslims in the world... it is said that we muslims, being the ones God loves the most, are the ones really tested in the world... the more faithful, the harder their life... same with relationships... the more u love them, the more you'll be tested... oh well... am getting phylosophical... haiz.... go do my ss... i have the attention span of about five minutes...